4 Types Of Sexual Relationships (And Other Freaky Stuff)

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Originally published on Truth Theory

Earlier this year I was on a very specific diet that required me to not have any sexual contact (with myself or others) for a period of 50 days. YOU CAN READ ABOUT IT HERE This sparked an interest for me in sexuality and understanding the (very broken) relationship we have with sexuality over much of the globe.

Some of the points that became apparent are-

Sex has become taboo, perhaps one of the most crazy things, as it is the number 1 thing we need collectively for survival.

Much of the current media does its best to cause confusion around sexuality. They promote it and suppress it simultaneously.

Porn is destroying our relationship with sex- it is violent, degrading and not a realistic representation of what sex is. What is even worse is it is very accessible, and due to many parents poor and uncomfortable relationship with sex- it becomes a form of education for curious children.

This led me deeper into the questioning of sexuality and eventually the examination of sexual relationship. There are many types of relationships that we can have with 1 or in many cases multiple partners, here are the types I have discovered.

Monogamous

This is what is commonly accepted as the type of relationship we should have. This is when we have one partner and being that both parties involved are honest, no one has any other sexual contact with an outside party.

This type of relationship is promoted by the Christian church, with anything outside of this being seen as sinful. But giving that 42% of marriages end in divorce is this the only way we should be exploring the world of relationships?

The issue that arises from monogamy is that of repression, is it repressive to hold back on sexual urges or is it just a sacrifice you make for the person you love?

Casual

A causal relationship is for those who do not want to commit to anything more than just spending time with someone. This can vary from just sex, to dating- but not committing to that one person.

A casual relationship can be great if both included are on the same page and are happy to not get to emotionally attached- however, we all know how them feeling can start to pop up for one and not the other- making things complicated.

Open

An open relationship is one in which 2 people are in a loving relationship, but also have sexual relationships with others outside of this. This can work, so long as you are comfortable in yourself and trust your partner deeply. When you have sex with another person, it is my understanding that you are opening yourself up to their energetic field and a piece of this person is being transferred on/into you. This is especially true for the female as they are more receptive when engaged sexually than the man.

To be in an open relationship you have to trust the person involved will not sleep with someone who is energetically unbalanced or mismatched, which as a result could end up with you, your partner or both of you becoming energetically unbalanced.

Also the issue of being comfortable with who you are- I am sure an open relationship could be good for one person if they are sleeping with lots of people, but the other may not feel the same if they are not. Again I think if you decide this is the path for you- you would need to be incredibly grounded, secure and rational for it to work.

Polyamorous

Polyamory is different from an open relationship as those involved actually have more than one relationship and all people involved know about each other. With polyamory not all relationship are necessarily sexual in nature, but could be affectionate without the sexual contact or mainly just about the sex, just to give a few examples.

One of the obvious problems that can arise as a result of this type of relationship is that of jealousy. If person A is with person B and person B like to spend more time with person C, person A may get upset. Again to explore this type of relationship you need to be very comfortable with yourself and trusting of your partner.

Swinging And Other Freaky Stuff

There are without a doubt many more ways you can explore your sexuality and boundaries to a relationship. Some people have sex parties, swing in parks or go to strip clubs as a couple. A lot of the time this is the result of sexual repression and an unhealthy understanding of feelings. But in some cases, as long as no one involved is getting hurt- it does no harm.

Conclusion

My understanding is there is no right or wrong type of relationship- the secret is in first being comfortable with who you are and secondly finding someone you can trust. All types of relationships are great for some and not so great for others.

Overall it is about breaking the bad habits of possession over a person and allowing your loved one/s to be free to explore- this doesn’t have to be sexual exploration, but the exploration of being human. Sexuality and relationships in general have a very close tie, and the sooner we can mend sexuality the sooner we can mend society.

Sex is the number 1 thing humans need for collective survival, but has been put in a cupboard under the stairs and many are telling us not to look. I know people in all the kinds of relationships I have discussed and many of them make it work- I think the key is in respect for different walks of life, so long as this does not come at the harm of other.

Thanks for reading, much love, Luke

About the author

I am Luke Miller a poet, writer and deep thinker! Everything I do is centred around the rebalance of the power structure to one that is harmonious, loving and benefits humanity in its entirety. We are entering a new age of love and I am here to encourage others to be a part of it! (Rev)olution R(evol)ution R(evolution) Revolut(ion) R(evolve)ut(ion)